Narcissists are>1. They are secretive about their finances.
In intimate relationships, this can include being vague about their money situation, like how much they make or have saved.
By keeping you in the dark, they're able to make>2. They are>3. They skimp>4. They are hypocritical.
Narcissism and hypocrisy go hand in hand because hypocrisy is a form of entitlement.
Most narcissists believe the rules don't apply to them, even though they are quick to enforce them>5. They are punitive with money.
Narcissists often use money as a tool for punishment. They may reward you financially when you do what they want, and then withhold money when they feel vindictive. This can feel unsafe, degrading and confusing.
For example, they may plan a luxurious vacation for your birthday, and then after an argument will refuse to pay for essential expenses. You may even feel obligated to play their game just to keep the household or business running.
What to do: Be prepared for this dynamic and have some funds set aside for basic expenses. Knowing it is likely to happen will help you come up with strategy for managing or exitingthe situation, instead of feeling blindsided.
